Perimenopause can feel confusing, exhausting, and isolating—especially when you’re juggling work, children, caring responsibilities, and household tasks. For many busy women, the realisation of perimenopause happens gradually. Recognition and coping often happen quietly, squeezed between school runs, work deadlines, and late-night laundry. You are not imagining it, and you are not alone.
Understanding Perimenopause: What’s Happening in Your Body
Perimenopause is the transitional stage before menopause, often starting in your late 30’s or 40’s, when hormone levels begin to fluctuate and affect many systems in the body.
Menopause marks the end of menstrual periods and fertility. It occurs when the ovaries stop releasing eggs and levels of oestrogen and progesterone fall.
You are considered post-menopausal when you haven’t had a period for 12 consecutive months (with no other medical reason).
In the UK, the average age of menopause is around 51, though it can happen earlier or later.
Why Perimenopause Can Feel So Hard
Hormonal changes affect sleep, mood, concentration, metabolism, and stress tolerance. For many women, especially those juggling work, parenting, and caring responsibilities, this hormonal shift can feel overwhelming rather than “just a biological change.”
Common Perimenopause Symptoms
Everyone’s experience is different. Your symptoms may vary from your closest friends and even differ from your mothers’ experience. Common symptoms include:
- Irregular or heavier periods
- Reduced patience or emotional resilience
- Brain fog – forgetting why you started a task or losing your train of thought
- Hot flushes and night sweats
- Poor sleep or insomnia
- Vaginal dryness or discomfort during sex
- Anxiety or low mood
- Fatigue and low energy
- Joint aches and headaches
Symptoms Can Differ for Women Across the Globe
Women from the global majority , African, South Asian, and Caribbean backgrounds may face additional challenges to access support and health care during perimenopause, such as:
- Cultural silence around menopause and women’s health
- Expectations to “cope” without complaint
- Caring for extended family alongside children
- Under-representation in menopause research and healthcare conversations
UK and international research suggests that Black women may experience more intense hot flushes, while South Asian women may report higher levels of fatigue, anxiety, or joint pain. These differences highlight why culturally sensitive approaches to coping with perimenopause symptoms are important.
Work, Motherhood, and Caring: Managing the Invisible Load
Whether employed, self-employed, or running a household full-time, perimenopause often coincides with peak responsibility years. You might be:
- Leading at work or building a business
- Managing young children or teenagers
- Supporting ageing parents or relatives
- Carrying the mental load of household planning
Perimenopause can make multitasking and concentration more difficult, yet many women feel pressure to carry on as if nothing has changed. Recognising your limits is not weakness; it’s wisdom and strength. There are options available to help make life feel more manageable during this time.
Support and treatment options may include:
Lifestyle support
- Making time for rest
- Incorporating gentle movement or exercise into everyday life
- Supporting your well-being through balanced nutrition* (see my page on Food & Mood)
Emotional and holistic support
- Accessing talking therapies
- Exploring holistic approaches that support physical and emotional stress reduction, prevention, and ongoing well-being
Professional support
- Speaking with your GP or accessing a menopause clinic for guidance
- This may include discussion of Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), which is highly effective for many women and widely prescribed in the UK
The Power of Sleep: Why Rest Isn’t Optional During Perimenopause
Sleep disruption is one of the most common and distressing perimenopause symptoms. Hormonal changes can affect body temperature, mood, and melatonin production, making quality sleep harder to achieve.
Practical tips for better sleep:
- Create a consistent wind-down routine (even 20 minutes helps)
- Have a digital sundown. Reduce or stop screen time at least one hour before bed
- Keep the bedroom cool and breathable
- Avoid caffeine after early afternoon
- Try calming practices such as deep breathing or meditation
For parents and carers of young children, uninterrupted sleep may feel unrealistic—but prioritising rest still matters.
Rest Beyond Sleep: Learning to Switch Off from Duty
Rest isn’t just about sleep—it’s about giving your nervous system a break from constant responsibility.
Gentle ways to rest during busy days:
- Sit quietly without a task for 5–10 minutes, focusing on your breath
- Listen to calming music or guided relaxation
- Step outside for fresh air
- Say no to non-essential demands
Many women, particularly from global majority backgrounds, feel guilt when resting. Remember: coping with perimenopause symptoms requires replenishment, not endurance.
Self-Care During Perimenopause That Fits Real Life
Self-care doesn’t need to be expensive, time-consuming, or perfect.
Realistic self-care ideas:
- A warm shower in the morning (or anytime you can) to ease aches and pains – Maybe even a warm bath!
- Nourishing meals to stabilise blood sugar
- Gentle movement such as walking or stretching
- Talking openly with trusted friends or family
- Seeking GP support or menopause clinics when needed
Any of the above approaches can help you manage symptoms and support your well-being.
If symptoms are affecting your well-being, seeking professional support can be an important step. If you’d like to explore perimenopause in a supportive, non-judgemental space, you’re welcome to get in touch or speak with your GP about the support available to you. In England, menopause support is available through your GP or NHS services. Remember, advocacy for yourself is a vital part of coping with perimenopause symptoms
Helpful Resources
see my pages on food and mood and recommended reading for further tips and information.
Check out these websites:
N.B.: I do not have control over the nature, content, or availability of these outside resources or sites and do not necessarily personally endorse the views expressed.
With Warmth
Gemma
